Thursday, April 12, 2012

the gift of life

The day after Noah died, we received a call from Life Source, the organ and tissue donation center. They asked us if we would like Noah to be a donor. At the time I remember just trying talk was a daunting task. They said they needed to know right away. "Yes, of course" was all I could really remember saying. The thought of them taking parts of him was sickening to me. Yet I knew if he could help someone else, that would be an amazing gift to give. It's quite a process once you decide your child should be a donor. They made me answer about an hour long worth of questions about Noah and myself (since I carried him). This was all the day after he died. It was unbearable. I cried the whole time. I understand it all has to happen right away, but trying to answer all those questions while you're in such a state of shock and while the world has just been ripped out from under your feet is an extremely difficult task. 

Fast forward to about a week ago when Life Source called me again. They said they had about 10 questions that did not get recorded during that first session. Are you kidding me? I have to do this again? They asked me all these questions about the week before Noah died. I barely remember the week before he died. It was a year and a half ago! The pain came flooding back. 

But yesterday I received a letter in the mail from Life Source stating that Noah's heart valves have been used for a little girl in Massachusetts that is less than a month old. The heart valve transplant saved her life. To know that a part of Noah is living on in another little girl is an amazing feeling. It makes me very proud as a mother to know your child helped save another child's life. I wish so badly I could find out who this little girl is. Obviously it's confidential information. Otherwise you better believe I would be on the next flight to MA knocking on their door. I would love to meet her. To see the girl who has my son's heart valves. Let's face it, I'd probably stalk them. To know their daughter has a part of Noah inside of her. I would probably move next door just to feel closer to Noah. Noah gave this girl the gift of life. And has made such a difference in the life of her family. Because of him, they do not have to feel the pain we feel everyday. And for that I am grateful.