Thursday, December 30, 2010

Happy New Year

It's hard to believe I had my best and worst year in 2010. I know Noah was born in 2009 but he grew up in 2010. We had him for most of 2010. And even though it's just been the last 3 months of this year that have been total heartache and indescribable pain, I want this year over. However no matter how horrible this time in our life has been, it will not overshadow what we did get with Noah. I have read numerous blogs these days about infant loss. There have been many many stillborns. No matter how you lose your child it is the worst thing that could ever happen to anyone in the entire world. However, I feel horrible for the parents that have had stillborn babies. They did not get to see their children smile, laugh, change a diaper, take them for stroller rides. They didn't get any memories. That breaks my heart because all I have now is Noah's memories. But no matter what you go through, you get through it. I'm not sure how you do but I could never have imagined going through this. I never imagined starting a new year without my peanut. But here I am. So with that said, I am saying goodbye to 2010. Goodbye to a horrible year end. Goodbye to a year that changed my life forever in good and bad ways. I will always remember the great and horrible memories I have of this year, but I am ready for a new one. Bring on 2011! And please let it bring us some joy. 

Happy New Year to you all and thank you so much for reading our blog, our stories, and our memories. They mean so much to us and we are so happy to share them with anyone who wants to read them. 



  1. jenna,
    i'm so glad to be almost done with this yr too. again you expressed so many of the same things i am thinking. and even though i'm waiting for 2011, the end result will be the same, we won't have our boys. and it will still suck.bigtime. but i'm have to cling to hope that 2011 will bring us both better days. and though i hate how we "met" i'm so glad we have each other to lean on. sending lots of love your way.

  2. Jenna:
    I'm so happy you're writing and getting your feelings out. I think and pray for your family every day. It helps me to read what kind of day or week you're having. 2011 will be a better year for you. It has to be. My heart continues to ache for you~
    Mary Sinjem

  3. beautifully written as always Jenna- thank you.
    cheers to 2011 to you and scott!

    ashley & justin rohn
    boston, ma

  4. Yes! Let's bring some joy in 2011!

    Sylwia Wollenberg